For a very long time, I was a pessimistic person. I didn’t think of myself as unhappy per se, but I wouldn’t have told you I was excited for life. I thought I was “realistic”, but little did I know I was totally holding myself back from a life that has so much more to offer. Looking back, I can see exactly where I was going wrong.
These beliefs are very common in our society and culture, but luckily, once we’re aware of them we can begin to shift into a new way of thinking and seeing the world.
Changing these four negative habits have changed my life and what I’ve been able to manifest for myself, and they can for you too.
1. Seeing yourself as a victim
When we make ourself a victim, we take away our own power. When you blame someone else or circumstances for your current reality, you make your situation hopeless, because you are in essence saying you can’t change it or do anything about it. And something can be done for absolutely anything imaginable. The first step is owning your life, your experience, and your reality. Your thoughts and how you see yourself are yours to choose. Everything you experience is in direct correlation with your beliefs. Your reality is what you create for yourself. Sometimes that’s a hard pill to swallow, especially if we’re used to blaming the world around us for all of our misfortunes, but it’s actually awesome news once you realize how much power that puts into your hands.
Never see yourself as a victim. See everything as a lesson instead and know that you have the power to begin changing your reality right now with the thoughts you choose to think. And I’m not talking about thinking happy thoughts in order to pretend to feel happier; I mean really choosing to see a different reality in your mind, one that you want to manifest, because your thoughts carry an electromagnetic frequency and attract situations, people, and experiences on the same frequency.
2. Limiting what’s possible for yourself
I used to think being well-off financially just wasn’t in the cards for me, and guess what…it never was for as long as I had that attitude! Nothing can come into our reality if we don’t believe deep down it’s a possibility. We may not be able to see how it could happen from where we’re currently standing, but if we open our minds and at the very least entertain the thought of it happening, and eventually get to a state where we know that it could happen, it will come into our experience.
For as long as you believe that you don’t have enough money, you don’t have a good marriage, you don’t have enough time, you don’t have a good job…you will continue to experience that reality. Don’t limit yourself! Don’t be afraid of wanting something more. The only thing that’s going to keep you from having it is believing you will never have it! Expand your box of possibilities and watch the miracles that start happening.
3. Not knowing what you really want
So many people spend so much time thinking thoughts of lack that they don’t take the time to really think about what they do want. When you take the time to figure out what you really want, you get excited. You have something to look forward to and anticipate. You stop letting life happen to you and you start creating the life you want. Life responds to us, not the other way around.
And going back to the last habit…don’t limit what you want. One of the best ways to figure out what you truly want is to ask yourself: if I had all resources at my disposal, what would I be, do, and have? I like to ask myself this frequently. And writing things down that you want is a powerful first step towards attracting them into your life.
4. Not loving yourself
I think everyone struggles with this one, and it’s the most profound change someone can make in their life. As the saying goes, “we’re our own worst critics”. How often do you hate on a certain part of your body or talk yourself down from something you would really love to have or experience?
One thing that has really helped me is realizing that every negative thought is just a thought. And I can change thoughts. It doesn’t have to be some intense, deep digging process that will either make me want to procrastinate dealing with or take me years to overcome. It can just be a simple and gentle changing of thoughts. When I catch myself being negative, I replace it with a loving thought. And soon, that becomes your new habit.
What are some of your hardest mindset beliefs to overcome? Which ones do you feel hold you back the most from having the life you want?
Jessica Dimas is the author of Anything Can Be: A Reference Guide for Applying the Law of Attraction. Connect with her on Facebook and Instagram for more inspiration and updates.